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Old 08-26-2013, 03:22 PM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,082

What KIND of open model relationship are you after? Swinging? Because that's not polyamory.

Why does the relationships need strengthening? What is weak within it?

How does outward focus (on casual flings where you share sex with others) bolster what is flagging better than inward focus?

I AM afraid that I won't be able to control emotional feelings from developing for others. I know that my partner has become more secure in recent years, but early in our relationship, he did have some distrust about me being emotionally involved with others.
So how do you plan to handle it if it triggers again? Could talk that out before going there.

Could check these out also:

Could not open when wonky within the relationship or from weak foundations. More players has a habit of MAGNIFYING the cracks.

What if I did develop emotions? If I don't want that, can it still happen?
Yup. It can happen. Check the forum for many "we started swinging but oops... feelings developed. NOW what?" type posts.

To me feelings ensue after behavior. When you share sex with someone, it triggers the brain cascade of hormones and yes... you could trip into developing deeper feelings there.

Could talk about how to handle that and if it is a dealbreaker to him if you fall in love with another person too. Do you both expect you to break it off with the new lover if you DO develop feelings? (And consider the flip side together too. What if your BF develops feelings for another? Then what is the expectation?)

If things go wahoonie... how do you guys want to break up? Because if you cannot talk about it now before going there, you don't want to first talk about it when you find yourself in those shoes.

Could consider the full price of admission to opening and if you still want to go there or not.


Last edited by GalaGirl; 08-26-2013 at 03:37 PM.
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