DH and I have known each other for over 22 years, together 19 and married 18 next month. His background - his parents are still married and it'll be 59 years this September. They, his parents, consider themselves Christian. Even dh's grandma was a pastor, so a lot of the monogamous pushing of what's "right".
Me, well my dad tried to be a polygamist years before I was born. My mom found the wedding invitation. She made the journey from Illinois out to a small town on the coast of Washington to stop the wedding. My dad had girlfriends throughout their marriage as she had boyfriends. They cheated on each other as they both did it behind each other's backs. Mom was a hypocrite more so than Dad. The only time they were "together" was when she went on the road with him.
Here you have two friends that fell in love with opposite upbringings. But I, I wanted what his parents had/still have (when I first met him). It was that stability I never had in my life. I could see the security my in-laws have with each other. They are mono, no doubt about it. But that's not how we started dating.
This one evening back when I was 22, slightly buzzed, maybe more, out on a Friday night at the local college bar, I decided I wanted to have children. Screw looking for a boyfriend, long-term relationship. I enjoyed being single, falling in love (NRE maybe) every other 3 to 4 weeks with the newest cute boy I had spotted. I picked the one guy who had physical features I wanted my kids to get, so I went up to him while he was playing pool and asked him to donate me his sperm.
Funny now when I look back on that, I had took me about 45 minutes assessing potentials, I was really serious about it and picked my husband.
His answer surprised me. "No, but we can practice at it". Those words, said just the right way with his deep voice, sent shivers through me and although we'd known each other for a few years, this animal attraction took over my body, getting me very turned on. Nothing transpired that night (pretty much a first for me since I was 15). A few weeks went by and I was acting like a high school girl with her first crush. His band mates were in my meditation class so I'd giggle with my two girl friends, telling them loudly so the boys behind us would over hear, about having a crush on DH. Almost a month later, after many times alone, we finally kissed. I had really fallen in love.
Two months later he moves in with me and my 2 roommates (a couple). At three months engaged to get married. A year later we were husband and wife. I didn't get my baby I wanted until over a year after the wedding even though that is what brought us together.