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Old 02-17-2010, 05:24 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alaska
Posts: 5,395
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We're sexually a V, but in terms of a poly-family we are a quad.

Myself, Maca, GG and my sister. We have 4 kids, 3 live at home.
Maca, GG, and I share expenses completely. We do the bills every month together and all the income goes into "one pot" so to speak. My sister is separate from this.

All four of us share responsibility of the kids equally. We work together to be sure that one of us is with the kids at all time and we all schedule our own time to do special things with the kids. We also all try to attend all special events (cubscouts, ceremonies etc) for the kids together.

We've lived like this for years... GG moved in 7 years ago.

The kids are great and consider all of us equally important in terms of immediate family.

I (like RP) often lose MY time in the attempt to coordinate everything else. As I'm the only one without a job, I end up with the ACTUAL paying of the bills, making sure chores get done daily, discipline, schooling (homeschool kids)...
Just a week ago I had a bit of a temper tantrum over the fact that the time is MY time to divvy out-not "GG's time or Maca's time" for me to ensure I am present, but my time to decide if I am spending it with one of them, the other of them, both of them or neither of them.
I think it sort of hurt some feelings, but afterward it seemed to make sense for them.
I compared it to children of divorce who struggle with "mom's time and dad's time". The truth is it's SUPPOSED to be the KID's time with each parent-so if the kid wants to spend it seeing their friends, so be it. But often the parent lays claim to it.
Likewise-the guys sometimes tend to think that some specified time of day is THEIR TIME with me, forgetting that this is MY LIFE and if I am sick, or harried, or need a break-then I need to NOT be running to do whatever thing they suddenly wanted to do with me....

NEWAY-I love having a polyfamily and I wouldn't have it any other way.
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