Yeah-I don't get into those topics on here much-because it just seems to derail the conversations that are in process. Too many people are struggling with what seem like pretty basic concepts.
WE ALL DO at times.
But you are right Mag. When I read on here what some people are complaining about I am thinking "wow don't even start exploring yet omg you won't be able to handle it".
I know GG would tell you I'm a very good Dom. Maca would tell you I'm a great sub. GG can't picture me as a sub at all. Maca can picture me as a Dom-it entertains him actually, but he see's me handle the world, so he knows I am capable, he just isn't going to drop into that mode to save his life. :P But that's ok, it's not his job!
You know though, I think those things and even the "poly thing" is much much easier than parenting. Shrug.
If you screw up any of the other, it's consenting adults who are struggling. But with parenting it's children. So you have to really consider and that responsibility infiltrates EVERY WHERE-you know?
That's one of the things I spend time considering that rarely manages to make it to conversations here-but it's part of why I got to the "GOD I HAVE A RANT" point with this topic.
I am looking at the kids thinking "what lesson is it that is being sent when they see a parent struggling and that parent can't/won't address the person they are struggling with?"
Kids DO SEE. All of the 'we can't tell our kids because' well-to be frank those kids aren't as naive as people think. They see much much much more than they admit or repeat.
So here you are as a parent telling kids the importance of direct, honest, forthright, considerate communication.. telling them about the need to take responsibility for themselves, their emotions, their needs..... but you aren't?
Um yeah. Wrong message.
It really is critical that when someone comes up-regardless of who it is, that we employ the same behaviors of communication with them as we are telling our children they need to use (and please tell me you are teaching your children proper communication).
But trying to explain to the world how D/s impacts the poly dynamic... that would just be too confusing here. There are extra responsibilities I have to GG as his Mistress that do alter the dynamic if he gets another lover. (I would never make it unavailable to him). There are also extra responsibilities Maca has to me as my Dom that have to be considered when he takes another lover. To be frank-I can't imagine it being feasible unless Maca dated another submissive personality. Not necessarily someone who was going to be HIS SUB. But someone who was experienced in that role so that they could understand that dynamic and how it effects things. Which, E, did understand. Whereas the younger chick-yeah no clue at all.
"Love As Thou Wilt"