while I do agree that it is the person who made the agreement's responsibility to enforce that agreement with any other partners, I ALSO think that it is well within the realm of reason for affected partners to point out (to whomever) that the agreement is not being upheld. If you aren't going to whole-heartedly OWN the agreement made then you shouldn't have agreed to it in the first place.
I don't necessarily think it's wrong for a person to point out an agreement isn't being upheld, but it's the principle of needing to remind your partner that something is breaking the rules. They should know and they should want to fix that. Them not acknowledging that would make me feel that they need babysitting in their other relationships. Not cool.
As for the caps thing, I shout words that are in caps in my head. I have no wish to shout at myself so if I see that sort of caps frenzy where someone is obviously responding emotively, I don't even bother. It hurts my brain.