Something to keep in mind is that just opening a door to ANY conversation sometimes helps with getting started on more serious topics.
When i need to bring up a topic that is triggering insecurities in me like the ones you describe; I try to start with "I am nervous about bringing this up because I know it is touchy for me and I dont want that to cause me to miscommunicate...."
Gives them a heads up that I am struggling with effectively communicating my thoights/feelings. So if something comes across "off" to them-they are more able to assess that it may be a communication issue not that I mean precisely what I conveyed.
Also gives them a heads up that I am feeling sensitive and them using a bit of extra tlc and caution in responses may be in order.
"Love As Thou Wilt"