I think I really do need to take a break from dating for a while. I know I'm using the attention to fill a void.. which is not a very good reason for dating.
I just feel so disillusioned with poly at the moment.. it is so hard to accept that the beautiful life I had, with my 2 lovers, who I loved and who loved me, disintegrated the way it did.
Ultimately, this is how I want to live my life... even if it is not actually the truth at present, I still consider myself living poly.
But I need to stop desperately clinging to finding ways to prove it.
sorry... just feeling very sad these days.
early forties, straight.