Oh, I meant he just has no good social skills, can't flirt, that sort of thing, he's actually incredibly polite towards women and very respectful. The idealized thing I just never got my head around, like since finding out, he had stated that he wouldn't be able to participate for a variety of reasons, but one would be he'd feel like he'd be damaging what he thinks our marriage should be about.
Anyways, she's not pursuing him really anymore, she realized that he would not be able to handle his baggage and such in a healthy way towards her.
I initially promoted it with him as he has always been very respectful and good about things beyond the social norm and such, treats my wife very well, plainly has the hots for her, and has been a good friend to me. But yeah, he can't handle it, and that's fine.
The initial point was more that she tried and is now adjusting to the rejection.