if he really is all that
then he will understand, and if he really is all that, you are making a mistake putting yourself through all this emotional turmoil, as it is all for not.
I wouldn't call having the courage to be yourself greedy, however being so worried that you might lose him if you were honest with him is closer to what I would call greedy.
Yes there are many individuals who go through life in denial, so people need to deny the truth because living the truth would be so scary that they know it would be too much.
But the truth is, it will set you free
For as much as "poly" people seem to think they have it all figured out, very few actually do, and while those few may be able to give you great advice that you might think is going to get you the results you have set as your goals, more than likely it won't. The only reason a person would be able to give you better advice when it comes to your life, if because you are not in tune with yourself. The sooner you learn who you really are, the better off you'll be.
As not being sure about who you are, will always lead to second guessing yourself, and there will always be some well intentioned (and sometimes not) person claiming to trust them, because they know, but unless they know better than you know yourself, it is a mistake to trust anyone but yourself or those you have enlisted whom you have decided you can trust while working on getting to know yourself, as a person can accomplish in a year with a genuine friend, what would take a lifetime alone, as unless you were taught as a child the how to know and trust yourself, you will need the honest opinion of a friend because the world is still yet full of those who deceive .
Whenever you have someone in your life, whether they be a friend or lover whom is a genuine friend, it is impossible for me to describe the sense of enjoying your life that is possible, if you would only let it. Most people "alive" today do not understand what it means to have "earned a living"
Most people cannot comprehend the freedom that honesty affords them, and I cannot begin to describe the sense of "knowing" that comes from the gifts of simple relationships that are nothing more than a genuine friend.
That genuine friend is so much more important than being in any romantic relationship and should you be lucky enough to bitten by a romance from a genuine friend, you are not only the richest person in the world, you are also the luckiest
if either one of your girlfriends or boy friends really are all that, the most foolish decision you will ever make in your lifetime, is to not share your life completely with a person who will or would have understood you and been genuinely supportive as they what enables a person the surety in life that they have always made the right choice, which is a powerful and empowering feeling when it doesn't include an aspect of denying the truth in order to believe it
When you find a person worthy to share your life with, without restrictions, do not let anything prevent you from sharing it completely, because you will end up regretting it