Thread: Zen Bonobo
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Old 08-15-2013, 03:33 AM
Zed Zed is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 27
Default Wavering attractions

I feel real shallow sometimes… but I know I'm not that kind of a guy.

The thing is, I've been feeling less attracted to Nisha the last few months, not emotionally, but physically. And I think it has to do with two main reasons:

1) Nisha's parents have been pressuring a marriage.

Nisha and I have been talking about getting married for a long time now. And looking forward to it! I had the proposal all planned out but it was going to take some time to execute. Her parents want the marriage sooner than later, and now the whole family has started making marriage and wedding plans without me even having proposed. I wish they would get off our backs a little because it's taking all the romance and excitement out of it. They don't seem to understand that, I guess because to them a marriage is a practical thing. Having said that though, they've been very understanding and patient, but I think their patience is running out. Anyways, all this pressure has made Nisha and I look at this whole thing as a chore and we aren't looking forward to it as much anymore.

2) Nisha's been… how do I put this… stress eating

She's been stressed the last few months and she stress eats… and so she's put on a bit of weight here and there. Now, she's been fat before and she's had pimple outbreaks and other things and I've loved her and stood by her through thick and thin, so let me tell you that I'm not a shallow pig who's only in it for the looks. I feel terrible for thinking this, but she's not taking care of herself and that's made me less physically attracted towards her and this has been affecting our sex life.

What really troubles me is, she didn't seem to want to do anything about it. I tried various ways to get her to do something about it, some methods were bad perhaps, but in the end all I did was show support and even do all the research for her. I kept going to my gym hoping that maybe it would motivate her too.

She does realise that she's not taking care of herself and she does want to do something about it, it would be wonderful for her and her confidence. She is absolutely beautiful and if she kept healthy, she would be unstoppable.

I wish I knew how to proceed with this, I want to be supportive. I've already told her that if she wants to diet, I'll do it with her. If she wants to go for yoga, I'll go with her. If she wants to run, I'll run with her. But she doesn't seem to initiate anything, also she says she needs time to get on her agenda herself. I'll support her anyway I can, she knows that.
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