Welcome to our forum.
Re: this person your wife is interested in ... perhaps a formal three-person sit-down is in order? Would you be able to talk to him and reassure him that you're okay with it?
What about this lady you're interested in? Have you been able to broach the subject of poly with her yet?
Hope things work out for both you and your wife. Any help Polyamory.com can be, just let us know. Have a look at our various threads and boards and see what calls to you.
Good to have you aboard.
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"