Originally Posted by AtlGayTriad
We are a gay couple who has become very interested in starting a Triad monogamous relationship with other guys.
Many, many couples new to polyamory want to protect their relationship from jealousy, so think getting a lover who will love and lust for them both equally is the way to go.
However, finding this new person is quite a problem! The chances are 10% or less that a new lover will fall in love/lust with both of you equally. Also, him taking on a couple with their own shared history is extremely difficult, for him.
Most poly people find dating separately works much better. So, say you (Guy1) find a bf. Maybe after you and he establish a relationship, he finds he also thinks your original bf is cool and sexy. Then you get your triad. Maybe he just likes your OB as a friend, or maybe there is no chemistry at all and they are merely polite acquaintances.
Not saying you won't hit the lottery and win 5 million bucks. But, what are the odds?