Originally Posted by Marcus
Don't buy into it then. If it isn't for you then do something else.
I'm not sure where you are getting the information that this is the norm, maybe Vix is right and you are reading a lot of the introductions or dating sites. That is one very specific type of polyamorous relationship; unicorn hunters and/or the triad-quad arrangement. How those arrangements work is beyond me but I am told that periodically they can be quite successful.
Agreed Marcus. Currently, we both date outside our marriage (my spouse IS friends with my BF). And we just made friends with this great couple, the wife and I have discussed how neat it would be to be a quad, but we arent sure it will really work or happen. Ive heard it cane be great, but rare.