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Old 08-11-2013, 11:31 AM
Cleo Cleo is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Europe
Posts: 483

Originally Posted by wildflowers View Post

So just truly learning emotional/relationship skills in my 40s, and in a relationship I jumped into way too fast, with tons of (unrealistic) expectations. It's been quite the crash course and emotional roller coaster.
Yes, this, very much this. Expectations need to be kept in check next time...

Originally Posted by wildflowers View Post
I wondered why, though, in responding to C, you didn't tell him this reaction:

quote: Ugh. So typical. Not a word about how he feels. Putting all the responsibility on me. /quote

Does he already know this, or is it implied in the answer you gave him? Because to me it seems like your emotional reaction and the answer you gave him don't fully match, and I wonder if communicating your true reaction more clearly might be beneficial.
Well, I did say something like:'you don't say what YOU want, am I the only one who gets to decide what's going to happen now?'
I did think about making it more emotional but that is exactly what I don't want from this email exchange and why I don't want to see him yet... too much emotion. I still get very angry at him sometimes and that needs to fizzle out, because it's not going to bring us anywhere to fight.

and yes I'm still around, because it's just too hard to get away from the stories of people who are going through the same stuff!
Cleo - forties straight female
Ren - husband of 20 years
Bo - BF of 1+ year
Lou & Jane - Ren's girlfriends
Lin - Bo's other GF
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