We have been negotiating for a long time. I told Mono from day one that I am kinky. It has never been a surprise to him. He was brave enough to go to two events where I let him take the lead as far as what he was comfortable with. He came with me and my tersiary the first time and watched us play. Even participated for a bit as my helper. The second time I worked on him and another woman. We spent the whole time together and played hard. He was collared and completely owned by me the whole time he was there.
He became interested in BDSM in terms of adding it to our relationship. During this time I realized that I was not satisfied with what my tersiary and Mono had to offer in it's entirety. Nerdist and I have long moved on to other things in our sexual relationship. I have a fetlife profile and modified it with Mono and Nerdists help. Added some new pictures and asked for what I want. I have had many replies but this one young man has really caught my eye.
In terms of how the two men feel about my involvement with others in a D/s way? We have negotiated the boundaries the same way as we have with other parts of our relationship. I have agreed to a no sex relationship with my subs. I am comfortable with that as I am not looking for more sex. I have been pleased that there has been response to my request just the same and that I can hold appeal without promising a sexual ending to my play times together with others.
I understand that sex is a part of BDSM sometimes and has it's place, but to me true submission and Dominance is about rising above that and using that energy to move forward and become more of each. I look forward to taking that energy and using it with the sexual partners I do have as I would hope my sub would. I also am hoping that I would have the chance to be someone in my subs life that they rely on for care of their needs in terms of sharing themselves. There is an importance that they can come to me with anything and I will be their guardian of sorts.
I hope that helps some,,, I have no idea what is being said in the other thread...
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