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Old 08-09-2013, 01:41 AM
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fuchka fuchka is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 361
Default Long-distance relationships - check

Just had a funny half hour that, I realised in retrospect, had a check in with each of my four ongoing LDRs

Ocean
Last talked: 5 mins ago
He is: happy. Met his best friend's friend yesterday (who has recently moved to the city. In fact, got a job that Ocean had applied for) and they really hit it off
Relationship status: chilled
Next seeing him: Monday! He's here for four days, then we take a train together back to the other city

Grotto
Last talked: 15 mins ago
He is: still hung over from two nights drinking in a row
Relationship status: ok. tender. Skype date last night was a bit bleah. He was sad about the thought of me staying in this city more. Kept saying he was missing me, but I felt like I couldn't connect with him because he was caught up in gloom. Baby, I'm here, spending time with you, this present moment. Be here too. I said as much, and our conversation went better afterwards. But he was hung over so not the greatest mood.
Next seeing him: Next Sunday. I told him I wanted to spend the day with him together, doing something. Go out to the beach, whatever. Just... quality time. Craving that.

Djuna
Last talked: 20 mins ago
She is: chirpy, keeping busy and well
Relationship status: ... It's good when we find the time to connect. When we don't, there's no urgency. I like it this way. Anything more wouldn't work for me. She seems to be okay. Hmm. We have been long distance for pretty much the whole 'relationship' (since May last year). There's a slow unfurling literary intimacy about it. Pervy pen pals?
Next seeing her: CAMPING! At some point in the next couple of months. Still planning this. We have a Skype date tomorrow morning, discuss camping is on the agenda

Plinth
Last talked: 30 mins ago
He is: on an upswing. Rained out of work (he work in roadworks, mmm)
Relationship status: casual. wonderful. It is what it is, and we're happy for it
Next seeing him: next Saturday night? I have something on during the day, and the evening is free. I have been struggling to express clearly the kind of plans I want to make with him. To me a "date" is "me and you", the purpose is - quality time between the two of us, and it's just the two of us (or more of us, if it's a date between three, or whatever). A "catch up" among other plans could involve other people, be more fluid. I'm pretty sure he gets that, but I think I need one more clarifying conversation to ease my worries around this. It's a concern that's come up for me a few times over the months we've been seeing each other, so I should deal to it.

Actually, funny... those four ended up in reverse order of appearance in my life. May as well do a time check too, since I'm being all 'stock take-y'

Ocean & I - together 7 1/2 years, civil unioned 4
Grotto & I - together just over 4 years now
Djuna & I - since May last year
Plinth & I - since Mardis Gras this year

Last edited by fuchka; 08-09-2013 at 01:44 AM.
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