Chatting with C a while ago about primary and secondary relationships. "Am I your primary?", he asked. "No," I replied, "A primary to me is someone you call when you need a ride to and from hospital." Of course there are many other definitions but to me that was one of the core ones. I have no family over here and rely heavily on friends to help out with such things.
Fast forward to Monday, playing tennis, running backwards for an overhead shot...down I go, ankle underneath me. It swelled up like a balloon straight away.
C got to be my primary, he took me to the ER, got a wheelchair, held my hand, joked with the nurses, took me home, popped to the shops and made lunch. He asked if he could be my primary now. He remembered the previous conversation. I said he could. We both understand that it is not what anyone else would call a primary relationship; we don't share finances, raise kids or share a home, but I appreciated him wanting to be important and to be considered a special person and if having that label makes him feel so, then I am happy to make him happy.
Me: mid 40s female
Mr Dom: late 40s male, single
Prof: 50s. we are working on things, single
Jay: early 50s male, divorcing.
Kip: early 50s. former lover, married