Originally Posted by Cleo
I'm sorry you're feeling sad about this.
I don't think it's a merely theoretical rejection btw, and I think you have every right to mourn the fact that this relationship is not going to be the way you would prefer it to be.
Adjusting expectations is always hard. You have to think carefully if what he does have to offer you is enough for you to be satisfied and happy - or that it will remain a source of frustration and hurt. Not something you can decide on immediately of course, but something to keep in mind and to watch out for.
Thanks, Cleo. I know I have to be careful not to find myself in the same situation I was in with L, now- accepting a relationship that doesn't meet my needs. At least I have my eyes open about it this time.
I guess what I'll do is continue to enjoy spending time with E as long as we're both happy with it, but start looking for someone who can give me what I really want and need. I'm also feeling a little funny about potentially meeting other people in E's city, since I often go there for kink events and I expect that other people from that city will be there, too. While I enjoy E's company... I don't want to let having fun with him keep me from spending time with a new potential. I wonder how I'd feel going to an event that he goes to with someone else. Have I already poisoned myself about the parties there I enjoy?
Life is so damn complicated and the kink community is on the small side. It's not like I want to fuck my way through the local kinksters. I just want to find one person for an awesome D/s relationship.