Originally Posted by xxscottysgirlxx
I do work evenings and is it hard. I have a varying shift so I can work as early as 3:30-11:30pm, 6-2am, or 11:30-7:30am. My job is also very stressful as I work in corrections. I actually think you are right about the energy. I do yearn to be home. It is all I can think about some days. Some days are better than others when it comes to my issues, but it is helpful to know I am not alone and to gain perspective on things, so for that I than you.
The shifts you are describing would be taxing under ideal conditions. While my circumstances are different than yours - the relationship with my SO came out of a failed triad, lots of emotional trauma to heal from, he is now going through a divorce, most of his focus is on his kids - which it should be - and we live in different towns - low energy levels make it far more difficult for me to cope with distance, and the lack of communication that can occur when his external environment becomes overly demanding. When I start to feel those twinges of anxiety, instead of letting myself wander down the path to hell, I logically tell myself that the reality is that I am tired, and that is all. Then I tell myself all the great things about the relationship.
For example, I moved this week. I am exhausted. I miss him. He is on call this week, and unable to communicate much. (Perfect storm, right?) And yet, Tuesday when I closed on my condo, my SO made the trip down in the middle of his work day after working 18 hours the day before, and surprised me with champagne. I focus on that rather than the fact we have had no time to communicate much since.
So yes, pay attention to your energy levels, and recognize that is the issue. Don't make it into a bigger issue than it is. I know it is very easy to do.