I got to see the list ( 2 pages) last night and we went through it from the point of view of what rules have been broken and what are likely to get broken and which ones are hard and fast.
We did not get into what I agreed with and didn't agree with.
Not all of the rules apply to the "dates", but those that were, were aimed at limiting and restricting and development of an emotional connection.
Examples: Dates are not friends.
If strong feeling develop for dates then the relationship must end, if the date develops feelings then the relationship must end.
No remaining friends after the date has been vetoed.
Cannot introduce date to friends or family.
Dates have no say in the rules.
I think it is fair to say that the dates are to be treated like fuck buddies.
Rather than say anything then and there I have taken some time to process.
I come back to, "actions speak louder than words".
Has A treated my in anyway that makes me feel like a FB? No, I really don't think so. And that is the bottom line for me. It is fair to say we are both very fond of each other, lots of NRE to wallow in. Lots of great sex.
Can I live with these rules and the other ones? I think so. The only major annoyance is the veto and lack of extended time.
Otherwise, does this relationship work with what I want? Yes, nothing is perfect and the pros currently far outweigh the cons.
I am not looking for a primary type relationship, which is why I started seeing him and C in the first place. We can all care and enjoy but not have unrealistic expectations of white picket-fenced futures.
In peculiar twist to all this, A's primary wants to talk to me on the phone. She has never asked to talk to any of the "dates" before. I agreed. Looks like we will talk next week.
Me: 40s female
Prof: 50s male.