A couple of thoughts I had on this situation…
If he was in a *mutually* agreed upon monogamous relationship with his partner at the time and he engaged in sexual activity with another partner, then he did cheat on and he did lie to this partner.
So, is it ok to lie and cheat so one can do whatever one wants, despite any standing mutual agreements?
I have a HUGE problem with being lied to (and to me, cheating is a form of lying), so my relationship probably wouldn’t survive my partner cheating on me. If I can’t trust someone, I’m not going to share my life or my body with him.
There’s also the issue of the unprotected sex. He cheats and has unprotected sex with two different women. His partner, who believes them to be monogamous, doesn’t have all the information to make an informed decision about her sexual activity with him i.e. - to engage in unprotected sex with him or any sex at all.
In this situation, though, there’s an even bigger issue for me: the fact that he videotaped these women WITHOUT their permission. That is not only creepy, repulsive and an invasion of privacy, it also may be illegal depending on the state. And I would wonder if he’d taken video of me without my permission.
Even if I was able to move past the cheating, I don’t know if I could (or would even want to) move past the fact that he’d violated another by videotaping them without their permission.