Originally Posted by jlbrickler
I asked that he stay the night at her house instead of coming home... I thought he understood and would be a little more considerate.
I'm confused, you told him to not only go on the date anyway but to stay the night? And you are upset because he didn't refuse?
If that's the case then what you are doing is playing games. Again, if I understand what is happening correctly I encourage you to stop doing that immediately. Say what you *actually* mean, not some clever version of it which the people around you need to decipher.
While you shouldn't have any say over his relationship (I'm glad to hear that you don't want to VETO, that shit is incredibly unhealthy) you absolutely should make sure your boundaries are known. For example, the issue with her wanting to get with you and you not being interested... you need to SAY THAT and don't mince words. If you allow that situation to go any further then you only have yourself to blame. Please make sure you speak up.
Now is not the time to practice being passive.