Doesn't have to be black and white
Just wanted to share something that has worked for me and my primary partner. A little about us now- We met 10 years ago and we have started talking about retiring and creating a life together after that. We currently have separate homes. There have been periods of time within our 10 years together where we have spent 5 to 7 days a week together. There have been times when we spent every weekend together- as well as times where we have only spent 1 or 2 weekends a month together. On one occasion, we separated for an entire year and on another occasion, for two years. We feel this has made our relationship stronger because it has helped us develop our separate selves and therefore we don't deal with codependency issues very much. We feel that our separations have made our relationship stronger.
The key to life is in being fully engaged and peacefully detached simultaneously and authentically in each moment.