"Monogamy?" You're focused on Mono (the person) now and PN is just roommate/family/brother status?
Where are all your guys? Mono, PN and the kid?
I felt you were overly polysaturated, but it's sad that Derby and Brad had to be hurt in the breakup.
Sometimes "me time" can stretch on a bit long and feel like loneliness, or boredom, but your peeps will be back! Take a bubble bath, get some retail therapy, jill off! Cook yourself a nice meal, watch a good movie or read some quality fiction.
Anyway, that's what I do.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
There's no lying in polyamory!
I'm a 58 year old woman with 2 partners:
miss pixi, my live-in gf, 36 (together since Jan '09)
Ginger, bf, 61, married, lives nearby (together since Jan '12)