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Old 07-12-2013, 07:11 PM
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Marcus Marcus is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Richardson, TX
Posts: 1,352

Originally Posted by Flowerchild View Post
As for Marcus, there's absolutely seniority in multi-person relationships. If I'm newer, I'd like to think they would treat me respectfully, but it's kind of my issue if I can't get along with someone more established (what am I going to do, tell my partner they have to divorce a spouse?). Member, partner, call it what you will. There's structures and rules....and it's difficult to remove someone from the group....hmmmm, come to think of it, it's totally like a union.

My, people get touchy on this forum.
Yes, people do get touchy on this forum.

You and I just have different ideas of what a relationship looks like. I don't do the interdependence thing where everyone is a link in a chain - all directly affecting the other. To me, my romantic relationships are almost identical to my platonic relationships. I don't have any say over their time, I don't have any rank, and I am responsible for my own level of involvement. If there is someone in my group of friends who I don't get along with I don't try and get them booted... I just don't spend time with that person any more than I'm comfortable with.

IV has been with CV for years and their "relationship seniority" is perfectly irrelevant. I'm dating IV, not CV... I don't directly impact their relationship any more than theirs impacts mine. If CV and I didn't get along the three of us wouldn't have moved in together and he and I wouldn't hang out... why would the goal be to get him booted out of the relationship just because I don't see eye to eye with him?
Me: male, 40, straight, single
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