I think u are justified in demanding an apology.
She has been disrespectful of the sanctity of your M-A-R-R-I-A-G-E.
You are married to him. IMHO, and only opinion, I think, from what you've said here that the three of you might need to sit down and discuss why she's saying things like this, how she treats him, and why it bothers you.
It's just me, my ramblings and the elevator music in my head.
Me: bi, reformed wild-child turned mom and house maid LOL
Crux: straight/hypersexual, possibly mono?
BC: our son, 5 years
CM: second son 9 months.
Mouse: girlfriend! Status new, feelings not so much.