Not totally be a buzz kill, but all he said was "Sam stuff. Different continent." Isn't that pretty much accurate though? At this point he doesn't want to know or see anything about you and Si. Well, when he does, what he sees is that you choose her. You choose her over him. Over the kids, over family bonding. I love my boyfriend, and even if he was in town for only a week, if there was a day like that, at a park then dinner than a movie, I'd be with my kids and hubby. Boyfriend would understand, and hey I might even check with kids and hubby if boyfriend can join us for part of it. Maybe the movie, or dinner, or just for a bit at the park in the beginning and then the rest of the day for the family.
Now I get that Matt was probably not EVEN going to consider Si being there for part of the day, but what was so hard about spending a family day with family? I would be upset if positions were reversed too. I get it, Matt is a bad bad man. He no like poly! He no like Si. He no want to see it!
You mentioned that if that had been a test, you would have failed it. Sadly, it was a test. It may not have been set up as one, it wasn't intentional but when you are rebuilding trust and a relationship, all these little things are tests. He's upset because you not only failed, you epically failed. Why would he want to consider poly or Si in his life again when the choice always comes down to her? That's the way he is probably feeling and most likely quite a bit of disappointment.
So yes, bad Matt, no like poly. Has he had any reason to??
Me: Late 30s pansexual poly.
DH: My husband of 19 yrs and father of 3 teen girls.
DC: LDR of +4 year