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Old 07-06-2013, 03:54 AM
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Anneintherain Anneintherain is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Seattle-ish
Posts: 826

I think there's not a problem to ask for not texting during certain times...somebody agreeing is not a sure thing, but to me text is no different than the phone. When I'm on a scheduled date night with my husband, we don't text/phone others during, and if we get a text we dont answer - we tell people to call if its actually important. Same goes with my other partners, if we get texts we mostly ignore them unless the other person goes off to the bathroom and we have a few minutes to check. If I cant resist, I say "mind if I check my texts?" And I appreciate the same in return from people I'm with. I've found since smart phones became common, relaxing and enjoying each others company has become an issue all over the place, so I'm not big on only having minimal interaction with people, unless we both feel that we are getting what we need from the relationship and relaxed about the split attention.

I find texting MUCH more intrusive than phone calling or email...a phone call will take my partner out of the room - fine, an email or IMing is just typing, but texting is little annoying bing noises that piss me off when I'm trying to just relax in the same space with somebody, or in the middle of a conversation with them. Don't really care what other people are saying - if something is disrupting my happy, I will ask about how to keep it from interfering, and negotiate and compromise to find a happy medium if needed. I sure don't consider it "exerting control" to tell a partner I dont want them to text while we are spending time doing an activity together (unless they have kids or a pregnant partner or are waiting for news of some sort), but if they want to text all the time, they are welcome to, but I will probably stop spending time with them.

I can't really get the needing to text OMG good morning! OMG good night! too people, but as long as people can wait to do it after we've gotten out of bed, or to do it before we curl up for the night, it's not a bother to me. It would be a bother to me IN bed though, so I'd speak up under those circumstances.
Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.
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