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Old 07-05-2013, 01:37 PM
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Marcus Marcus is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 1,587

Originally Posted by Jac View Post
I've only recently found that I am polyamorous and I have a lot of questions, if anyone can lend me some advice.

Most importantly, I'm currently in a monogamous relationship that saw its first year only a month ago. How do I tell him? I don't want him to feel as if there is something wrong with him or as if he doesn't satisfy me, which is partially my fear of what will happen. I've just come to realize that I'm not happy with just one partner. I mean, I am for a time but then I feel as if I want more. My boyfriend makes me happy but I need more, how do I convey this effectively?

For right now, that's the most important question for me and I'm sort of freaking out.. I love him and I want to be with him, but I also need to concern myself with me. Thanks in advance..
A couple of important things to remember:

1. Be honest. What you have written here is a great starting point
2. Be kind. Your partner might have some difficulty and take some time to be constructive about what you are saying. Give them a break and let them work through their process.
3. Be informed. For me, I would want to know what I am actually proposing. Read through these forums, check out some articles on non-monogamy, get an idea of what you are hoping for. Note: I am not telling you that you should hit him with this stuff... just have some answers in case he has some questions.

This will hopefully take several conversations so don't expect there to be some great revelation when you bring this up.
Me: male, 43, straight, non-hierarchical, independent
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