Thank you all for the replies.
JaneQSmythe-- Super helpful! We will definitely check out the forum resources you recommended. Love the date night idea too! It was great and reaffirming to hear your suggestions because we've already been doing some of the other things which makes us feel like we're in a healthy spot.
Cleo-- The connex in the past have been more centered around play and/or the boundaries for emotional connection have been more clearly defined (i.e. being with someone who has a primary they are committed to). Our current situation has become tricky around special events for example-- who is invited, in what order if the other person can't or doesn't want to go, etc.
Dagferi-- We feel better sharing at this point but we shall see. I may come a knockin' on your door with more questions in the future...