What Paul said above me here. You are donig a good job, I think you are too worried. There are plenty of pitfalls in poly, any relationship really, and you take them as they come and communicate. communication is key and it sounds like you guys are already good at that. Look, I didnt tell my spouse the very first time BF and I kissed either, but we had our poly convos and made our boundries nad everything has been completely out inthe open since then. Look forward, you cant change the past.
keep on keeping on