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Old 06-25-2013, 05:18 PM
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JadeDoor JadeDoor is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 95
Default New to this at 30, hoping to find help

Hi everyone. I don't know all the abbreviations yet so forgive me. I'm a 30yo/f who has been married 5 years now to a 35yo/m. We have kids together and live a pretty normal life. Right before I met my husband I reconnected with an old friend who was living a poly lifestyle. It was something I was always curious about and so I started talking to him and his partner more about it. I was starting to become very interested and realizing this was something I wanted to work on too when I met my husband who was very much NOT that way. In the interest of making him comfortable, I gave up my dreams of having other relationships.

He and I have been through a LOT in our five years of marriage and have realized that we love each other enough to make compromises for one another. I recently let him go on a date with another woman, someone I am friends with who I know he's attracted to. It went really well and he had a lot of fun. He came home and said it made him realize how much he loves me and how he wants to make me happy. He agreed to give this all a try.

For now I am just letting him date. I feel like it would get too complicated if we both jumped right into it. Especially since he was the one against it at first.

Neither one of us is sure exactly what we're looking for yet. Not just sex. We'd like relationships. A "best friends with benefits" type of relationship perhaps? I don't even know if that exists really, but we are trying to figure it all out. With the kids and my husband's ex wife (he has children from a previous relationship with her and we have a child together as well) we can't be very open about all this right now and so we're not looking for people to move in with us at this point. It would have to always be more of a dating relationship with him and I being each other's primaries.

Anyway, I feel like I've babbled enough. Feel free to ask whatever you'd like. I am here to learn and grow and find what I'm looking for.
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