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Old 06-25-2013, 03:53 PM
london london is offline
Join Date: May 2013
Location: UK - land of the free
Posts: 1,635

This is not a fundamental incompatibility like if you needed to have children with all your partners for it to be a serious relationship, and your partner didn't want children. This is a really small thing that takes next to no adaptation. I agree that it isn't your partner's job to fulfill your every little whim, however, I do believe that in a relationship, each partner does have a responsibility to meet the reasonable needs of one another. If we take the baby situation I mentioned, it would not be reasonable for your partner to abandon his desire to not ever have children, in order to meet yours of having children. That just means that your relationship has no future, your long term needs are totally incompatible.

Something relatively small like this takes minimal compromise on both sides. There isn't a right or wrong about how much contact partners should have, you just simply have to acknowledge that you have different needs. Whatever the reason for you having those needs, you have them. Now, unless your partner is absolutely opposed to any more contact than you have because it goes against the nature of his very being, then perhaps you have to either like it or lump it. I doubt your partner feels as strongly as that though, that's why I suggested a compromise. Something that your partner feels they can realistically meet but that still allows him space, and more importantly, for you to develop security. You have to acknowledge that he needs something different to you too, though, and that means sticking to not being in contact every single day, all day. Every other day sounds reasonable to me. You also have to accept that often, it might be just a short message of acknowledgement rather than a full conversation. Compromise on both sides.
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