So your husbands had two girlfriends and you can share his, but neither if you are allowed to have your own relationship with anyone else because he is so insecure. I happen to believe that the majority of being poly is accepting your partners loving other people. When you can't do this and seek to control how much they love other people and who they love, you stay to move away from what polyamory is. Or at least what good poly is about.
If ask your husband how he could feel more secure in a polyamorous relationship, I'd help him in any way I could and then I'd go and find other lovers. He would have to learn to deal with it our leave but I certainly wouldn't let his petty issues get in my way.
Last edited by london; 06-25-2013 at 08:52 AM.