In other news - Grotto and I have started being open to having children. We're not trying as such, we're just letting things happen if/when they happen. The other day we jokingly called it "baby roulette"...
I mean, this is serious business. Are we ready? I think we're ready enough. Like, we know we could handle it. But there are probably more things we could discuss the details of, really. I don't know. I've had sufficient conversations with Ocean about this, but I'd like to talk with him more.
From my perspective, I'm turning 30 this year and if I'm going to have my own children I want to do it in the next few years or not at all.
Regardless, I'd like to be involved in the raising of children - whether it be kids in my friends or family, or foster children.
Big Life Things.
Another Grotto-related thing, he went away with a group of friends for the weekend, on a trip organised by Bijou. They rented a big house, partied up, unwound. It was a good break for him, but he came back feeling unsure about how things stand with him & Bijou, and what he should do about it. She can be hot and cold towards him, and he's too close, too vulnerable not to be hurt by that. He's gonna see how he feels in a few days.
I'm cultivating as much care as I can. Care for Grotto, care for Bijou. I listened to what he had to say, and spoke from a place of love. I have had wild jealousy towards Bijou in the past and it's been good for me to admit that. Ultimately, I just want to be there for him (cue - Stand by your man).
Okay, must scoot. I'm on duty being host to Ocean's parents while he finishes up some work tonight. All's well in the village.