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Old 06-23-2013, 04:48 AM
london london is offline
Join Date: May 2013
Location: UK - land of the free
Posts: 1,635

Originally Posted by SchrodingersCat View Post
Have you ever actually spoken with this other man and has he told you that he believes she's not satisfied by you? Or are you just a mind reader?

That he disrespects you and your relationship is your own perception, an interpretation based on how you what you yourself would think were you in his shoes. Aside from fucking your girlfriend, what signs has he given that this is the case? Has he actually told your girlfriend that she should leave you?

There is no thinking pattern that is ubiquitous amongst all of any sort of person, be it monogamous men, submissive women, homosexuals, etc.

You asked us how you can avoid getting in this situation again. My suggestion is to check your assumptions at the door and practice open, clear communication. Don't assume that just because some guy is monogamous, then he's obviously trying to steal your girlfriend. Give your girlfriend some credit that, as an adult, she is capable of making decisions that are right for her. TTrust that she will take your feelings into consideration.
I think you've got me confused with the OP, but to answer your points, yes, more than one monogamous man has said that if I was sexually and romantically fulfilled,i wouldn't need multiple partners. Some have insinuated it in general discussion and talked about polyamory as a phase one goes through before settling down and others gave been more explicit about their feelings on the subject. One person kindly started talking about this whilst he had his cock in me. I left mid shag.

Personally, I believe people who can feel valued in a situation where their partner isn't monogamous are more poly wired than they are mono wired. I think most of being poly, or having healthy polyamorous relationships anyway, is about accepting your partner having other partners and still feeling loved. It's quite easy to have multiple partners yourself and know that each has their own place in your life, but being able to trust and feel that from someone else when you're not their one and only is more complex. I've never been involved with someone monogamous that had that capability but I have seen evidence of it online. Assuming what people say is true, of course. I'm quite sceptical about it though. The majority of time I come across MonoPoly relationships it's clear that the mono party is making a sacrifice and for the most part, I don't think it's ethical. It might be consensual but I often think that sacrifice that they are so obviously making is unhealthy and detrimental to their psyche.

Last edited by london; 06-23-2013 at 05:01 AM.
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