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Old 06-21-2013, 01:01 AM
Wifeto2 Wifeto2 is offline
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 31

Originally Posted by gorgeouskitten View Post
This is a valid and common worry, here is how i feel about it. I sleep with BF on Monday, later that day i could see spouse and still want to bang him too. Why? Not because im a sex maniac, but because I want the connection, intamicy, and hottness, with BOTH of them (we are a V, not a triad) I can have all the sex in the world with one and and still want the other. Spouse and I even find it helps to share our encounters with others, and discuss the things that we like that are between the two of us.
See that is how I am with dh. Gf and I havnt done anything sexually without dh yet so we ll see if that happens. To top all of this off this is my first sexual relationship with a female without dh around.

Originally Posted by Magdlyn View Post
Same here (though I *am* a sex maniac, ahem), even if I have sex for hours with Ginger, I still want miss pixi too, after Ginger leaves. She's all, "Ginger didn't do his job satisfying you?" I respond, "Oh yes he did, but I still want the connection and bonding with you as well!"
it is about connecting with him. I know when he ejaculates I have done my job as a partner right.

Originally Posted by BlackUnicorn View Post
I feel insecure sometimes. I see that your biggest worry is that you will be replaced as a (sexual) partner by your gf. Ask yourself how likely that is. Is your husband with you just because he hasn't found anyone else, or are you special to him?

Sometimes you need to fake it to make it. Insecurity is like a constant tape playing out in our heads "I'm not fun/sexy/smart/pretty enough". Or even "If my partner truly knew what I was like, they wouldn't want me anymore". So instead of listening to this broken record, try switching your internal dialogue to something constructive instead. "My partner is with me because they value me as a person, not just because they can't find someone else. They have the option to walk away anytime, yet they choose to be with me instead."
thank you. I have told both of them to go ahead if they wanted. I'm still struggling with the insecurity at times but I'm managing it.

I have said to gf and dh that I need them to be patient with me and my insecurities and that it was something I needed to work through. Should I bring up every time I'm feeling insecure? I worry about making them feel bad. I don't want that.
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