Did the deed...
I submitted my 2 week notice and resignation letter yesterday. I didn't get tongue-tied while talking to the executive director, so I felt like I said everything that I had intended to say.
In some ways I feel like there's a weight lifted from my back....although this will be the longest 2 weeks of my life!! In other ways I'm scared. I get a lot of satisfaction from working, and in many ways my identity is wrapped up in being the best at what I do. But now I don't have anything lined up besides working for FJ while looking for a job. I will be focusing on strengthening a side business that I really love, so that'll be good. But I still worry about not finding a job that I can embrace. But this one wasn't working for me, so it's better than being miserable! Who knows what life will bring.
FJ and I were tense last night. I was majorly stressing about the job thing, and he was tired and stressed after a long day and didn't have the patience to deal with my freak out. So he just closed his eyes and went to bed. Gah, I hate that. But I've learned to just let him have some space, and he'll come back and help me through my shit in time. It's just hard not to feel a little abandoned while I'm waiting. MD could tell something was off and asked. (She has uncanny insight) We talked about the job situation, etc. and she made me feel much better, and encouraged. She was really sweet to me, and it was nice to feel some affection from her emotionally.
Tonight I'm helping her move some more boxes to her new place. Love seeing her face even if we're just working. I can't wait till she moves in. She's talked about having us all over. She's also talked about having FJ over for a date night. I know I see her on my own all the time, but it's usually with her daughter around, so I'm going to have to specifically ask for a date night for us too without children when life gets back to normal. Or maybe, she'll ask for it too. One step at a time, I feel good about things right now.
franchescasc-33, bi female, likely monogomish formerly in triad relationship with:
FJ-36, married 15 yrs
MD-35, gf for 8 months
Currently dating SM, male, 40, monogamous