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Old 06-17-2013, 05:26 PM
onoma onoma is offline
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 78

Originally Posted by BoringGuy View Post
So what if it's "poly behaviour" or not? You said you two broke up... how did you say it?

There's your answer right there.
Technically, by "move on" I meant leave this city for a different one. I guess I worded that badly.

Of what use it is to you to take this situation you helped create and are continuing to enable and put it in a box and call it "poly"? If it helps keep you in your comfortable denial that your partner "really is poly after all" despite the fact that SHE TOLD YOU SHE IS NOT REPEATEDLY YET YOU REFUSE TO ACCEPT IT (did I say that or just think it out loud?),
So you think it's monogamous behavior to truthfully tell someone you love them while you're dating other people?


It seems to me (from what you've said) that perhaps she feels that even though she loves you, your relationship is over - or a dead man walking. Don't hang your hat too much on semantics. If she can't have an open relationship (and she's been clear on that), and she's looking, then she's probably pretty much done.
If she's done, though, why is she holding on? The struggle for me has been that she acts exactly like my girlfriend of three years, right up until bedtime. I can even envision her kissing her date good night, then coming home and kissing me good night.

That's the thing here... I wonder if she's poly because then maybe we stay together. If not, I wonder if she's just using me for comfort. Either way, she doesn't seem at all inclined to let go. Several times I've told her being in this pseudo-relationship is too hard for me and I need space... but that just turns into a fight, which ends with her spending all her time with me and me hoping things will go back to where they were before.
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