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Old 06-16-2013, 10:45 PM
Dirtclustit Dirtclustit is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Middle of Oregon
Posts: 431
Default if someone has to fuss over rules

or someone is trying to impose rules that another doesn't agree with, it pretty much spells doom.

With some people it is necessary to be very explicit and clear with them exactly what is and is not breaking the rule. Many people have a tendency to be dishonest with themselves and if you find you have to explicitly spell out the finer details of your household's rule, you'd likely have trouble with such a person eventually. Some people may genuinely not understand disclosure and keeping people informed. But I bet it wouldn't be hard for any of you to discern whether or not the person who broke your rule did so innocently.

In fact that may be an good description of when rules may be necessary for successful relationships:

When problems arise within a household or a relationship, and the offender's behavior is not obvious as to whether or not the violation was done in innocence. When someone does another person wrong, whether they meant to or not is fairly important.

If their are discrepancies about whether or not the action was wrong, then there are issues that go beyond simple formation of rules, and it is likely that those who cannot agree on whether actions are right or wrong, simply do not have compatible ways which set things in order of importance in their lives.

Hierarchy and Consent are often the underlying root to anything and everything that ever appears problematic in this simple, yet complicate life
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