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Old 06-13-2013, 03:37 PM
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Location: Deep Underground, Off the Coast of California
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Originally Posted by Natja View Post
Are you talking of people who 'want' to be Unicorns or people who just find themselves in the Unicorn position, because as the latter that was not my experience at all and no one could ever accuse me of suffering with self esteem problems (like Daria says "I just have low esteem for everyone else"). So no, not me and I will really be hacked off if anyone thinks that (I was also, the only member of the triad gainfully employed when we met btw).
I assume the former was implied?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Natja View Post
However, I rarely (as in, never) see a single, poly experienced bisexual woman offer themselves up as a 'Unicorn' though. I have only seen such ads from women who have never been in a Poly relationship, whether they have self esteem or money issues though, I cannot say.
Broken record, again, but I'm seeing why.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Natja View Post
To the OP, I know it sounds like it will be a very bonding experience but remember, what you have with your wife now, is the uniqueness of that bond. You can't just expand it to include another person. My triad did not start from Unicorn Hunting, we read everything, we wrote everything and we educated ourselves very well but at the end of the day, keeping everyone included and insisting on being intimate and dating together all the time, it will end up seeming tyrannical.
I'm not sure. I'll say that the entire experience of admitting to this and seeing what would entail was very healthy for our relationship. Talking about some of what was posted, including things like this, will probably be really helpful as well; so again, thanks to everyone.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Natja View Post
No single bisexual woman who has been a third in a closed, live in Poly-fi situation offers themselves up to do it a second time, whereas couples often come back after failed triads looking for another 'third') This should give you an indication on where the power lays with this configuration and who tends to suffer the ill effects after the relationships go south.
I think there was/is an honest hope that our efforts could result in a somewhat genuinely egalitarian situation. The purpose of the post was to partially explore that. I'm not sure. I think I'm aware that like anyone else, I like to think better of myself when it comes to such matters than I'm truly capable of.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Natja View Post
As for me, I would rather have my toenails, pulled out with a pair of rusty pliers than ever, ever do that again.....It was all sorts of crazy, even with the very best intentions but no, I can't think of a worse thing to be than a Unicorn.
Sorry. Again, this puts into context why it's so distasteful, so it does help.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Natja View Post
My opinion would be to swing, as others have said, there are women who love a threesome who might want a relationship with you both, at least it would be more natural, but otherwise, just wait and see if someone does approach you whilst just enjoying each other and being happy in monogamy, for most people (like 95%) it will never happen, as long as you accept that and are still very happy, than it really doesn't matter, you'll have all the love you'll ever need.

Good luck
Natja
No matter what I do appreciate the need to pick a more natural avenue to pursue this, if at all. The suggestion is nice, though. Thanks for the info and advice.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Natja View Post
I hear from Poly in the news that Polyamory: Married and Dating is to be repeated proceeding the new series...

Wait for the flood of couples all wanting their hawt blond stripper Unicorns....

I hate that frickin show..........
Another reason I haven't watched television in two years. I also wear a tinfoil hat and occasionally bathe in Purell. Though I guess I can understand why I'm even more annoying if you guys are getting an influx due to that.
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