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Old 06-13-2013, 09:03 AM
InsaneMystic InsaneMystic is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2012
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Quote:
Originally Posted by london View Post
Would it bother you if someone was willing to wait, but wouldn't consider you to be in serious relationship until you started having sex? So you could do all the things you are comfortable with, date, be affectionate, everything you need to trust someone, but that person wouldn't consider you a girlfriend or necessary fulfil boyfriend obligations until you start having sex?
Quote:
Originally Posted by london View Post
I just think that your obligations to a friend is different to that of a partner. You still have obligations, but in terms of input into decisions about the future, it would be more asking their opinion. I wouldn't consider my friendships when considering a game changing situation whereas I would consider how they'd impact on my romantic relationships.
I know you didn't ask me personally, but chiming in anyway...

While I'd find that stance hard to relate to - and of course, with someone like me, you'd be settling for friendship permanently, as genital sex with me is forever off the table and not just a "sometime later" thing to wait for - I don't see anything wrong with it. Basically, I don't make any such hard boundary between a close friendship and a partnership in the first place... to me it's just a question of which of these terms everyone involved chooses to go by; there's little tangible, practical difference between "best friend" and "partner", IMO (R. and I use both of these for our ship pretty much interchangeably, too), especially if you're open for non-sexual but sensual/erotic stuff like cuddles, kisses, breast play with someone you'd still call just a friend.

I guess that's me having an anarchistic streak in regards to such labels, and a very strong need for independence that pretty much makes me suck as a "primary" partner in the usual sense, anyway (living together, shared finances, etc.pp.), above and beyond the question of sex. *shrug*
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