So I think my fiancee tried to rape me Sunday morning. I was sleeping in the tent (we work Ren Faire and camp out during the weekends of it) when he came in. I woke up, frozen from what was happening to him pull my underwear to the side and starting to finger me (which to my knowledge is the fifth time this has happened in our 4 years together). After a few moments of that, and myself getting wet despite my fear, he tried to push his way in about 4 or 5 times (thankfully my body didn't betray me to the point of not tightening up to block him).
I'm planning on confronting him about it at home today when I'm home from work and he's home from site. Lamian at the least should be in the house so even if we are in a different room I will not be alone with him. I have now realized the trust that I had gotten back from him emotionally neglecting me for about 18 months is now completely shattered and I'm afraid of him. I don't know if this has happened during instances I have not woken up and therefore am not aware, and cannot trust it won't happen again.
Have hit a point where I need him to acknowledge what he did and agree to both couple counseling and counseling for himself for us to continue. Otherwise I have no idea where to go from here. There's a part of me that wants to tell him if he doesn't that we are still getting married because I'm not screwing my parents out of the 10K they have put up for this because he won't respect boundaries and I need to be married to get food stamps but that he is moving out and finding somewhere else to live. We'll be married on paper but nothing else.
Woodsmith: My husband
Merry: Tig's wife/slave
N8: Merry's boyfriend/owner
Elle: N8 girlfriend
Ruby: Part of the Leather Family
Logan: Leather Sir in the Family
Arc: Logan's boy
Holly: Leather family
K: Holly's sub