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Old 06-08-2013, 04:48 AM
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Marcus Marcus is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Portland, OR
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sabina16 View Post
... he was shocked, hurt and not willing to consider it in any way...I could see how much just discussing it hurt him... It would slowly start to destroy him and I would rather leave and spare him the horrible pain.... I feel there is more potential for hurting people and complicating life with the lifestyle... i don't know if I will ever have the stomach for it.
So, fear-fear-agony-fear-pain... got it.

I would suggest taking a step back and reflecting on what it is that you want. You said you got "the itch"... you've got the itch for what? Casual sex? A long term loving relationship with a new partner? Jumping out of airplanes?

Either way, the afore mentioned fear-fear-agony-fear-pain seems like it's going to force you to pick between what you want and placating your hubby.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sabina16 View Post
I feel there is more potential for hurting people and complicating life with the lifestyle... i don't know if I will ever have the stomach for it... I don't have a high tolerance for drama and all the negotiating about time spent and boundaries and all that makes me exhausted just thinking about it.
It is common for people used to more traditional relationship styles to make these kinds of assumptions. Some relationships spend a lot of time talking about boundaries and negotiating time, etc. I personally don't care to create situations in my relationships which prompt me to pull my hair out.

Your relationship(s) will function however the people involved in them want... whether monogamous, swinger, polyamorous, etc.
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