Well, ok. I sense co dependency. She's everything to you, you don't even have any friends? Just because you "work" with people stupider than you, doesnt mean you shouldn't have friends in line with your own mental capacities.
To be a better husband, get a life? She's got one, why don't you? You're trying to glom onto her bf (sorry, but it sounds that way)... What can you do to get more friendship and support at HOME?
When will she be done with grad school? If you want her to come back t.o you when she's got her degree, time to shape up. As you know.
Good luck with the new therapist. I hope they are more poly friendly. You're on very shaky emotional ground. Being poly takes lots of self esteem and trust and you seem low on both
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
me: Mags, 59, living with:
miss pixi, 37