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Old 06-04-2013, 04:02 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Nowhere
Posts: 1,640

Originally Posted by Marcus View Post
I like "5) Self esteem is sexy".

As far as I can tell the only way to have actual self esteem is to set goals, learn skill sets, and be productive. Focus on accomplishing your personal short term and long term goals and I'll bet your 'luck' will improve because you'll feel good about yourself and it will show.
Oh it was that! I was going to say that you HAVE to put yourself first at all times, whether you are in a relationship or not. This does not mean that you don't give up things sometimes to help someone else; what it does mean is that you don't put someone else's priorities and overall well-being at the expense or detriment to your own. This is not the same thing as agreeing to see one movie instead of the other so you can both sit together. This is about expecting someone else to change fundamentally who they are just to please you, or the other way around from whatever point of view you want to look at it.

But i disagree with Marcus that setting goals is the only way to improve self esteem. I have been a lot happier since i discovered that i am NOT a goal-oriented individual and that the whole goal-setting culture was driving me crazy. However, i do think that for individuals who ARE goal-oriented, NOT setting/reaching goals can drive THEM crazy. It's important to figure out which personality type you are, but be honest with yourself, don't let people's image or expectations of you get in the way.

I am almost out of time, i have to wrap this up now. But i will reflect on ways to build self-esteem and try to come back with specific suggestions for the "type B" personality.
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