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Old 06-01-2013, 01:41 PM
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Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Metro West Massachusetts
Posts: 6,583

Well, of course you're nervous. I've been dating since 2009 and I still get butterflies before a first date with someone. Just ride it out, and keep an open mind. For me, nerves calm once the conversation starts.

If she's never dated a couple before, and you two have never dated as a unit, are you aware of the common pitfalls of "unicorn hunting" and the rights of secondaries? Triads are notoriously hard to manage. THAT makes me nervous for you.

It's much different to have a long time gf to be "shared" by an established couple, than a one night stand 3some. Almost always, feelings will be unequal between one dyad or another.

Are you prepared for her to just prefer you, or just prefer your husband, or for one of you to like her but the other not, or for one of you to like her, but she doesnt like you, and you feel rejected as your partner gets all the lovey feelings returned while you don't?
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

Mags (poly, F, 62), dating... again!
Pixi (poly, F, 40) my darling nesting partner since January 2009
Master, (mono, M, 36), Pixi's Dom/bf since April 2013
Kahlo (my ex, 46)
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