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Old 05-31-2013, 12:36 AM
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Marcus Marcus is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 1,587

Originally Posted by YouAreHere View Post
I dunno. It may all be semantics, but the different ways of wording things can convey a heck of a different meaning.
"I dig you, but I'm going to take care of myself even if that means I have to adjust the nature of our relationship". To me, this is a fair statement and one that everyone makes even though most don't vocalize it. We can call them boundaries, game changers, deal breakers, etc.

The brunt of the actions needed due to a veto is put on the one being vetoed. There has already been an agreement that if one of us says "no way" the other will capitulate and make whatever changes are required to assuage their insecurities. This is basically the same principle as a boundary or a game changer; it's just that the discussion has been pre-decided for some reason. Personally I think it would be better to actually discuss what is going on than to fall back on a general purpose "nuh uh".

[Edit] I agree with YouAreHere, if that wasn't clear
Me: male, 43, straight, non-hierarchical, independent

Last edited by Marcus; 05-31-2013 at 12:39 AM.
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