Originally Posted by Seasnail
I care to love her because I love her... she'd be my sister if she'd been born of the same parents. She doesn't get to 'consent' to my lifestyle choices any more than she would if I were moving across the country. We don't agree on everything, but she's my family nonetheless. I don't think that we won't be friends because of it. I'm afraid of her anger, I'm afraid of hurting her, I'm afraid she will misunderstand.
Why don't you start with that, or something similar? I thought it was beautiful. Speaking as a woman who was the judgemental friend for 18 years (oh how I'm eating my words now), I think she can handle it. Maybe her judgement will just go underground for a while, but when the friends who love you that much see how you feel about your partners, it makes it all right even if they don't agree. Good luck!