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Old 05-23-2013, 03:31 AM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 4,901

The Golden Rule is not an injunction to impose one’s will on someone else!
I understand it fine, nycindie. That was the whole point I was trying to make, though probably not as cleanly as I could.

"Platinum" is just derived from Golden Rule just like "Silver rule" is the "negative" side of Golden Rule. It's all part of the whole Golden Rule package. But the bottom line for me? I find that as a parent, when teaching my kid that stuff, it's a whole lot easier to get to the point and teach the kid "platinum rule" kinds of words.

What does a kid know but to take things very, very literally? I have encountered some adults are that way also -- very, very literal.

So I find it saves trouble all around to just leave no room (or as little room possible) for misunderstanding. Just spit it out from the get go. "Treat others how they want to be treated" as a little maxim idea I find useful.

It could encourage approaching and asking the person -- "How do you want me to treat you? I'd like to be treated like this. Could we talk about that and get to know each others preferences?"

Couldn't trying that approach help the OP become more assertive about stating their needs?

If I ask the other guy how he'd like to be treated first, then explain some things I need as examples, it makes the other guy more agreeable to engaging in larger conversation with me about negotiating needs for all. Better than if I were to come at the other guy all bossyboots with "I need ____" kinds of laundry lists that could be misread as "demands" and get them on the defensive.

It's only a suggestion for the wording in the end -- others are free to use whatever phrasing serves them best when relating/negotiating with the people personalities they are dealing with in RL.


Last edited by GalaGirl; 05-23-2013 at 03:54 AM.
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